Everyone brings scars into new relationships.

The problem comes when people feel this new partner can heal these scars, while still not creating new ones.  But healing your heart is not their job.

An old boyfriend may have verbally abused you, so you go find a man who speaks gently and uses tender words of love.  But this man has his own battle wounds; his own demons to work out. 

The key is not to look at the other person for healing, but instead to help each other bring healing into their own lives.  This world is hard enough—bringing more burden into someone’s life could ruin them.  Instead, be the text message that says, “I think you’re amazing!  Everything will be okay.”   

When you look at the one you’re with; realize they are not your past.  Give them the ability to love by first showing them love.  They should never have to prove they are worthy of you, because you chose to be together.  Do something unexpected for them, so they have no choice but to smile and thank God they were put into your life.  That’s when the magic in a relationship happens.  The ability to truly serve the person you’re with, so you become better people to help light this world up in love.

-Jason O’Toole

(Source: memoir.jasonotoole.com)